Over the past year, I’ve connected with a special woman and devoted mother I’ve grown to respect and admire. We met initially when I appeared on a radio show she co-hosts – and then again when she invited me to appear on another show to help people understand what grief looks like. Last week she sent me an article she wrote and asked me if I had seen it. I hadn’t – yet I’m so glad she shared it with me.
This article is the first guest post I’ve included on my blog. When I read it, I knew it belonged here!
Often people do not recognize grief when it’s connected to losses unrelated to death. They don’t realize that unresolved grief can be extremely harmful. Sandra Beck has written a powerful, sensitive and transparent article about grief related to deep losses other than death. What she has to say is critical—and that’s why I wanted to share her article with you.
Here’s an introduction – and I hope you’ll take a few minutes to click on the link and read all of it. You’ll be glad you did!
“I recently read this great book on Grief by Judy Brizendine and though her marriage ended because her husband died, mine ended because my husband had an affair and left. Very different endings, but both included many of the same elements of the grieving process…Grief is like carrying around this big, heavy ball of lead in your heart that makes your brain go fuzzy and saps your energy. It’s chaotic. It’s overwhelming. It’s frightening and it’s utterly exhausting.
“I wanted to write about grief from a lost marriage because most people only think about grief when someone dies. But to some of us, a marriage is a valued, cherished and vital part of our being that needs to be grieved when it is lost…
“Loss is loss. There are a lot of losses associated with getting divorced – especially after a long time marriage. When you are ready, it’s worth learning about grief. It can help you put a label on what’s happening so you don’t feel crazy or like you are going crazy.”
© Photo courtesy of fotofrenze