Stunned By Grief

Do you have any idea how powerful your thoughts are — especially during challenging times such as grief?

It’s not unusual for people who are grieving to start feeling anxious weeks before the holidays arrive. I was just talking with someone who reinforced this idea. Her friend (who has experienced several losses recently) has already been talking about how much she dreads the holidays and knows they are going to be terrible. If she keeps on thinking, talking, and believing this way — her holiday experience will definitely be awful! However, it doesn’t have to be.

Our minds actively work to turn our thoughts into reality. You’ve probably heard of the ‘self-fulfilling’ prophecy. Our minds want us to be right, and through a complex process between our bodies and our minds, we live out our thoughts!

I challenge you to control negative thinking. Don’t buy into it! When negative thoughts creep into your mind (and they will!), replace the negative ones with a positive thought. Decide that while your holiday season will be different this year — it’s still going to be good.

Plan something you enjoy. Your ideas don’t need to be complicated (or expensive). Just arrange to be with someone you like, and decide to do something you’ll look forward to.

Seize control of your thoughts and your attitude will follow. You have the power to harness your attitude as your friend during grief. If you start to veer off course, remind yourself to focus on the blue skies, not the gray clouds. I know you can…

© 2011 Judy Brizendine

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About Judy

"Out of your deepest pain comes your greatest gift." Judy writes about grief and loss in a realistic, practical way - to help, inspire, encourage, and educate any who face loss in their lives. A fellow-traveler's approach to grief ...

• When the ‘U’ Word Is Missing, Grievers Suffer - August 15, 2017
• Reject the ‘J’ Word that Devastates Grievers - July 28, 2017
• The ‘O’ Word that Hits Grievers—and What to Do about It - October 3, 2016
• The ‘I’ Word You Never Expected with Grief - August 25, 2016
• The ‘A’ Word No One Wants to Face in Grief - August 11, 2016
• Is There a Shortcut through Grief? - July 18, 2016
• Hard Lessons Learned about Grief: How Can You Turn Things Around after a Tragedy? - June 30, 2016
• Don’t Be Afraid to Give Sorrow Words - January 12, 2016
• Three-Legged Stool Is Crucial, Particularly during Tough Times (like Grief) - November 24, 2015
• Grief Is Hard - October 22, 2015

Tags: attitude, controlling negative thinking, coping with grief, holidays, powerful thoughts, self-fulfilling prophecy

This entry was posted on Tuesday, November 15th, 2011 at 5:37 pm and is filed under Coping with Grief, Decisions and choices, Holidays, anniversaries, special occasions, Stunned by Grief. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.