Posts Tagged ‘changes’

What Color Is Your ‘Grief’ Umbrella?

Wednesday, January 23rd, 2013

Line of brightly colored umbrellas related to grief

You’re probably thinking, “I don’t even know what a ‘grief’ umbrella is”—and you’re asking me, “What color is your ‘grief’ umbrella?” Let’s work through this idea together …

Grief is a mystery and a shock when you first meet up with it. Nothing you’ve ever seen, read, or thought about grief prepares you for its reality. Just like death—when death steals someone you love away—a staggering realization hits your senses that your life has changed and it will never be the same again. That’s the way grief is, too. And when grief shows up, trust me, you’ll need ‘grief’ umbrellas.

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Posted in Changes, Coping with Grief, Decisions and choices, Effects of Grief, Emotions, Hope, Needs of grievers | 4 Comments »

Grief Brings Change — and You Possess a Powerful Tool!

Tuesday, May 22nd, 2012

colorful horizontal layers of sunset_peach gray green_grief_change_attitudeGrief is tied to significant loss, and grief brings change.

Whether your loss is the death of someone or the end of a relationship, loss of health or mobility, loss of your home or job, loss of your business or your assets, loss of security, or any meaningful loss, you will experience change. How you respond to the change (and this will likely be many kinds of changes)—will determine your future. How you respond sets your course in a positive or harmful way.

Attitude is one of the most powerful tools in your life, possibly the most important one. Your attitude determines how you ‘see’ what happened to you, and it will be a key element in how you respond.

Much, if not most, of what happens in your life is outside of your control. So how will you respond to the majority of events, conditions, and circumstances you face?

Think about it. Life is about learning. When we don’t get it right the first time, we usually get another chance to learn the lesson—and we keep going back to square one until we ‘get it.’

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Posted in Attitude, Changes, Coping with Grief, Decisions and choices, Response to tragedy, Stunned by Grief | Comments Off

How We Coped with Grief during the Holidays — and How You Can, Too

Sunday, November 6th, 2011

Tree Lined Country Road with Changing Leaves of Red, Gold, Orange, YellowCoping with grief during the first holidays or anniversaries after the death of a loved one or other devastating loss is especially difficult. Your pain is fresh and memories are tender. Emotions stay close to the surface, and those around you tend to be uncomfortable about what to say, how to act, and what to expect as the day approaches.

Like many families, ours had established traditions that carried over from one holiday to the next. Often the menu stayed the same from year to year, the place and time for the get-together was set, and everyone knew what to expect. Each person even sat in the same chair! Sounds boring, but it’s surprising how many families keep the same traditions over the years. We become comfortable.

After my husband died, the thought of celebrating the holidays the same way we always had — but without him there — seemed much too difficult. His absence would have been especially glaring. Who would sit in his chair? How would we respond to the emptiness?

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Posted in Coping with Grief, Decisions and choices, Emotions, Holidays, anniversaries, special occasions, Stunned by Grief | 2 Comments »

When You’re Stunned by Grief, Change Is Unavoidable

Friday, September 2nd, 2011

Deep orange sky at sunset with sun just above horizonAs quickly and as certainly as the sun will drop below the horizon in this photo, when grief strikes, change comes right along with it.

You may experience a few changes or many. Your circumstances will determine which internal and external changes occur — and how much they will affect you. They could be physical, emotional, financial, or spiritual ones, and possibly changes in relationships.

When your world turns upside down, no wonder change follows right behind. At first, change is staggering and maybe even paralyzing. I just want you to know what to expect.

I also want to assure you that your grief journey is a step-by-step process. Try not to take on too much too soon. You’ll find your own pace. I’d like to lend a hand.

Hold on!

© 2011 Judy Brizendine

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Posted in Changes, Coping with Grief, Effects of Grief | Comments Off