Posts Tagged ‘healing’

Grief and the Holidays

Friday, December 13th, 2013

glowing candles amid greeneryGrief and the holidays are especially difficult — and there’s just no getting around it.  Even when your loss was sometime ago, the holidays bring memories back to life.  With time and healing, perhaps you can look back on those memories with smiles and gratitude rather than the crushing pain you felt earlier – yet emotions seem to be supercharged at this time of the year.

I read a beautiful article written by Katherine Ingram about her experience of grief and the holidays.  The thoughts she shares are similar to my own.  I could identify with her heartfelt (and wise) words, and I hope they will speak to you, too.  I asked her permission to share the article – and she graciously agreed.

Hope you’ll click on the link to read Katherine’s article.  I think you’ll be blessed if you do.

Here’s the link – Good Grief: The Holiday Edition

 

Photo courtesy of www.bing.com

Be Good to Yourself — and Choose to Grieve

Friday, September 21st, 2012

series of steps, open door in middle, closed door at top, passageway, light shining at topYou may be wondering what I’m really saying. Choose to grieve?

You’ve just been overwhelmed by a major loss. You feel powerless. You’re in agonizing pain. You don’t know what to do or think. And I’m urging you to choose to grieve. What do I mean?

At first, your pain will spread to nearly everything you see, think, and feel. Your thinking will likely be impaired and unfocused, and your concentration reduced. You won’t be in a position to consider and make logical decisions right away. However, don’t be overly concerned. This fuzzy state of mind will improve.

Your initial state of shock and disbelief is your body’s way of protecting you. Your loss is too difficult to absorb all at once, so your body and mind seem to enter into an ‘autopilot’ state. You’re able to function in a basic way, but at the same time, your body protects you from grasping all that is happening within and around you. Reality will hit soon enough.

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The Devastating Reality of Sudden Death

Tuesday, February 14th, 2012

single white calla lily nestled among green leavesWhen someone dies unexpectedly, the shock and pain are indescribable. Often we are paralyzed. We don’t understand, and we don’t know what to do.

Millions of people around the world are mourning the sudden death of Whitney Houston and trying to take in the reality of something they cannot believe is real. For Whitney’s family and those who love her the most, the pain is beyond comprehension. My heart breaks when I think of what her daughter Bobbi Kristina, her mother Cissy, her ex-husband Bobby, and others closest to her are going through right now, because I’ll never forget the unspeakable pain I lived through fourteen years ago when my husband John went mountain-bike riding and never came home. Tragedy strikes—and we are overwhelmed by grief.

No one is prepared for death, even if someone is sick and isn’t expected to live. And when death comes unexpectedly, we feel even more helpless and confused. Grief is not something we think about until we come face-to-face with it, and by that time, it’s too late. We’re thrust abruptly into grief, we don’t have a clue what is happening to us, how to respond, or what to do—and at some point, we’ll know we have to find a way to navigate the fear, confusion, and uncertainty of our personal grief journey.

Misunderstanding surrounds grief.

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Gratitude During Grief

Tuesday, January 3rd, 2012

orange rose nestled among varied bright yellow flowersYou may be thinking, “Gratitude during grief — are you kidding?”

A friend shared something with me that changed his life. Last year he started a gratitude journal. All year long, he’s written something in his journal each day. Even on the worst of days, he’s been able to find things to be grateful for.

Before going to sleep at night, he thinks about his day and records his gratitude in his book. Each time he writes, he starts out by saying that he’s glad to be alive! He almost died. That experience changes the way you think. Some days my friend also begins his day by writing in his gratitude journal.

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